Day 740 - Dad

Day 740...

Today's post is going to be different to my usual daily chronicling of events and will explain the lack of a post from yesterday.

Saturday did not turn out as expected at all. And without going into too much detail we lost my dad. It was unexpected and the circumstances around his passing compounded the loss.

He was a fiercely independent person who did not like asking for help or even admitting that he needed help and ultimately that spirit did not do him any favours. As we get older we want to retain our dignity, our independence and our own self-responsibility but we have to acknowledge that it is okay to ask for help and support along the way. But now is not the time for 'should haves' and 'could haves'; he is no longer with us and we have to learn to accept that, remember him and celebrate his life.

Losing my mum seven years ago broke my dad and every day since her passing he has struggled. He had some days better than others but in the main he was lost without her. And as my brother said in a social media post earlier today that was testament to the love that they shared and the bond that they had. My dad was lost without her, he had lost the driving force in his life and he never recovered from it.

Over the years he had tried to carry on by going to the gym a few times each week, by visiting his favourite pub each day for lunch and the occasional meal out with his 'gym buddies'. Unfortunately for my dad the two years of the pandemic did not help his situation, being cut off from the world affected his mobility and the activities that were keeping him going. 

He has simply existed since my mum passed but at least they can now be together. We have gained another star to look down upon us.

But we have lots of amazing memories to remember him, and my mum, with. Numerous holidays together, visiting Vegas, his love of Elvis, birthdays, Christmas's, teaching Simon DIY tricks (or bodges!), helping me with the kids when Simon worked away, Dad's (and Grandad's) taxi service, his speech at our wedding and 'Magnum P.I' dance moves, welcoming Simon into our family even if he did chase him with a pair of scissors threatening to cut his long hair and always calling me Poll or Polly (I know not why).

He was a warm, kind and generous soul, and will be missed by all who knew him.

Portrait painted by Simon in 2005

Miss you dad, but I know you and mum can be together once more.

xx

Happy Mothers Day - UK!

Day 361...

Happy Mothers Day...well it is here in the UK! Always very confusing that different countries celebrate it at different times of the year. Apparently here in the UK it is always the fourth Sunday in Lent...I have to thank my podcast co-host Michelle for supplying me with this knowledge as I had no idea!

Well my Mothers Day started quite late after a disturbed nights sleep but once up and about I had message from Molly and one from her her boyfriend Dan as well as gifts presented by Ethan but thoughtfully purchased between him and Molly.

The card was suitably Star Wars inspired...

...and gifts were suitably Disney...

I had spotted this bag online a few weeks ago but had never gotten around to ordering it for myself...good job I hadn't!

Can't beat a pair of fluffy, silly, Disney socks!

Simon and I decided to take a walk out this morning as the weather forecast for the afternoon was looking pretty wet. Well we wore our wellies and headed out across the fields; which having had some rain this past week were rather squelchy in places. Just as we headed out we felt a few rain spots and Simon nipped back inside to pick up his umbrella which was put to good use as at one point walking across a field the rain and hail decided to come at us sideways so the umbrella shielded us from it a little. But by the time we headed home the weather had calmed down and the walk home was dry and almost sunny. We stopped off at a small supermarket that did Costa Coffee take-out as all the other local cafes do not open Sundays...the only problem being that the machine was 'out of order'!! This did mean that when we got home, and the coffee had brewed, it was really well deserved and enjoyed. Another 4 miles in an hour and a half, taking March's total to 25 miles.

We then decided to see if we could get a hotel booked for a weekend away. All being well hotels should be allowed to open mid-May so we hopped online and managed to get a hotel booked for a seaside get-a-way not long after Simon's birthday. We also have another weekend away booked in July that was actually scheduled for last July but the hotel very kindly allowed us to keep the booking and simply move it a year forward. At least we have a couple of things to look forward to all being well.

This afternoon Simon has been battling with a couple of pieces of his R2D2 build that just don't want to take the spray paint; this can happen occasionally as grease or dirt can interfere with the ability of the paint to adhere to the surface. But he has one piece that no matter what he does just doesn't want to play...more sanding needed to try again tomorrow. 

The day was rounded out with our usual Sunday Disney quiz, although my scoring this week was pretty naff...although that does mean I don't have to set questions for next week! But it was, as it always is, lovely to chat with some now very familiar faces; names on social media that have now become friends.

Take care, wherever you may be.
xx

Day 4

Here we are Day 4 and it's Mothers Day here in the UK.

A lazy Sunday morning was how the day started, yummy keto breakfast, a good cup of coffee and some lovely and thoughtful gifts from my two children. I even got a message from Molly's boyfriend which I will confess brought me to tears. He is such a lovely guy and my heart goes out to him and Molly; he lives at the other end of the country so they can't be together at the moment and that just sucks big time.

Apparently the card was bought a few weeks ago...just seems rather appropriate at the moment! And look my favourite chocolates and a Disney jigsaw to keep me occupied.

We then had an impromptu chat over the garden fence with our neighbours (more than 2 metres apart!). I then tackled a few normal household tasks while Simon took his R2D2 outside to do some sanding, resulting in the two quotes of the day 'that was a good sanding session' and 'don't mind the wet droid in the bathroom' to which Molly responded 'only in this house would you hear something like that'!

We have set up a gym in our garage and Molly was on the hunt this morning to see if we still had a skipping rope...after searching through boxes we came up empty handed. So the benefit of having a prop maker in the house meant she was directed towards some blue cord rope and some white tubing to make handles but just as she was about to complete the job a neighbour gave her one that he'd got and never used! Have to confess there then followed a wipe down with anti-bacterial wipes and a hand wash!! Molly also received the official word from her employer (a well known national shoe shop!) that they were closing there doors as from the end of business today - phew, much relief all round!

It has been a beautiful, sunny, clear skies day here today and so Simon and I took a stroll out into the countryside next to where we live. We are so fortunate that we can do this, and at this time we are truly appreciative of where we live. We have all seen on the news and social media large numbers of people out and about at parks, historic houses and beach fronts clearly not observing social distancing and it truly boggles my mind. The message is clear...stay at home as much as possible and if you do go out keep 2 metres apart from anyone else...do this and you might just save someone's life!

Simon and I ended up having a much longer walk than we expected and I'm ashamed to say discovered pathways that I have never walked before in all the time that we have lived here.

We saw some beautiful countryside, and we could see for miles and we even encountered some Alpacas!

We did see a few others out and about for walks with their families and dogs but I did remark on something. You know how when you're out and about in a bustling city centre and it seems to be only you that looks where you're going and then moves out of peoples way? Well let's compare that to social distancing shall we...and remember Simon and I were walking the public footpaths and bridleways of England which run through open fields...so why was it that only Simon and I found ourselves putting distance between us and others! I had a runner go past us at one point when we were back on the main road and I swear blind had I took a step to my left I would have tripped him up!

I have been inspired today by the number of posts on social media shouting out that we all need to stay at home as much as possible, to keep our distance and expressing disbelief at all those out there that think social distancing means going to a public park and mingling with every Tom, Dick or Harry! They are proper Dick's!!

So let's all pull together, recognise that we need to do this for the good of all and for once lets do as we are told. Stay at home, practice social distancing...I do not want anyone within 2 metres of me please...I am not being rude I am simply thinking of my health, your health, the tens of people we will both meet and perhaps the elderly person one of those people comes into contact with. Be brave, be a hero and conduct yourself with some common sense and common decency...please!

See you tomorrow xx